From the River to the Sea

I’ve had conversations recently with people both inside and beyond our congregation about the phrase “From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free,” which has been invoked in the activism happening for Gaza in the last few months, and which has been used in Palestine for decades. The upcoming 25 Mile March for Peace and Liberation in Gaza is using the phrase as a part of its title. Because I had not heard it except in the context of a rallying cry for the civil rights and just treatment of Palestinians in the place where they live, it seemed - and seems - to me a poetic and evocative expression of that longing.

I have, however come to nuance my understanding. What many of you probably already know is that at least some Jews experience “from the river to the sea” as deeply harmful and antisemitic. Because it has been used by Hamas - even included in its charter - with a meaning that includes the complete annihilation of the state of Israel and its citizens, it is associated only with violence, terrorism and destruction. In other words: destroy all Jews living between the Jordan River and the Mediterranean.

Contemporary activists and politicians like Rashida Tlaib, who continue to employ the phrase assure detractors that, “From the river to the sea is an aspirational call for freedom, human rights, and peaceful coexistence, not death, destruction, or hate.” This is certainly the way I have been understanding the call of the phrase.

I have become more circumspect about how I understand “from the river to the sea,” because of how evocative it is in both Jewish communities and those advocating for Palestine. I may not use that language in my own advocacy, but I am part of Mennonite Action. And because Mennonite Action is endorsing the 25 Mile Walk and because they continue to use “From the River to the Sea” in their title and publicity, I thought I would share their language about how they understand that call and cry for freedom from the river to the sea.

The following is in the intro to the sign up, written by organizers who include Jews and Palestinians as well as many other diverse identities:

When we say "Freedom from the River to the Sea," we call for universal freedom and safety for everyone from the Mediterranean Sea to the Jordan River. We call for universal access to food, water, shelter, education, and medical care. We call for freedom of movement and freedom of expression regardless of religion or ethnicity.

When we say "Freedom from the River to the Sea," we long for true liberation for all peoples beyond false borders. Our conscience calls us to forcefully and unceasingly demand an end to the continuing Israeli expulsion of Palestinians. We know that there is no military solution. True safety and freedom must be collective. We unequivocally call for Palestinian self-determination from the river to the sea. We call for an end to Israeli apartheid, Zionism, nationalism, and settler colonialism.

We are walking toward the world we yearn for: Indigenous sovereignty restored, land held as sacred, not as property, and an end to all systems that exploit, extract, and kill. We are walking for peace, life, and liberation, from every river to every sea.

Come walk with us!

The Radical Origins of Mother's Day

As much as I love brunch, bouquets of spring flowers and cards with adorable hand-prints on them, these were not the intended outcome of Mother's Day when it was first suggested. The origins of this day fall to abolitionist, suffragist, author and total boss in petticoats, Julia Ward Howe, who was herself a mother of six. Ward Howe wrote her "Mother's Day Proclamation" in 1870 as a call for mothers of all nations to join in a council of peace, never again to see their sons and husbands lost to the violence and destruction of war.

Ward Howe had not always been a pacifist. In fact she authored the lyrics to The Battle Hymn of the Republic to champion the fight for freedom of enslaved people. But after witnessing the carnage and chaos of the Civil War, her political activities began to include anti-war activism as well as the campaign for suffrage for women and the formerly enslaved.

Here is Ward Howe's proclamation in full. It is still full of fire and passion. I dare you not to be roused!

“Arise, then… women of this day!

Arise, all women who have hearts,

whether our baptism be that of water or of tears!

Say firmly:

We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies.

Our husbands shall not come to us, reeking with carnage,

for caresses and applause.

Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn

all that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.

We, women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country

to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.

From the bosom of the devastated earth a voice goes up with our own.

It says: Disarm, Disarm!

The sword of murder is not the balance of justice.

Blood does not wipe out dishonor,

nor violence vindicate possession.

As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil

at the summons of war,

let women now leave all that may be left of home

for a great and earnest day of council.

Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead.

Let them then solemnly take council with each other as to the means

whereby the great human family can live in peace,

each bearing after [their] own kind the sacred impress, not of Caesar,

but of God.

In the name of womanhood and of humanity, I earnestly ask

that a general congress of women, without limit of nationality,

may be appointed and held at some place deemed most convenient,

and at the earliest period consistent with its objects,

to promote the alliance of the different nationalities,

the amicable settlement of international questions,

the great and general interests of peace.“

~ Julia Ward Howe

I Object: Saying No to Violence and War

As I was putting the finishing touches on the outline for the youth workshop on militarism and non-violence, I heard about the fatal shooting at Ingraham High School. Two beloved members of our community were in the building. Several of our families over the years have had students at Ingraham. Many of our faith family live in the neighborhood. A student was killed by another student.

 
I'm sure you, like me, had the sinking, awful, scared, not-again feeling in your guts. Maybe you, like me, shed tears of grief and rage. Grief that young people continue to be endangered by their own peers with firearms, grief at the loss of life and devastation to a family, grief for the students and staff traumatized by witnessing this event, and others who will not know how to walk back into this place that has been violated, grief for the hearts of the young persons who turn to lethal violence, and absolute rage at a system and government and nation whose obsession with militarism and individual freedom continues to cause these griefs.

Everything - EVERYTHING - that Jesus taught and lived was an embodied objection to the militaristic and violent practices of empire. He grieved and got angry about it too! And yet he even rejected the violence of those whose anger let them to rebel against their oppressors with force. We, his followers, are called to raise our voices in objection as he did.

It's one of the reasons that I feel like the crash course I'm offering for youth on conscientious object is still relevant, even though it's been literal decades since young people have been called up by military draft. It's all connected. The same individualistic, militaristic culture that spends half its discretionary budget on "defense" is the culture which infects the hearts and minds of people - young and old - such that they wield a gun against a fellow human.

This morning after election day I am absorbing the news with some relief that the "red wave" has not been as overwhelming as some predicted. But democrats are not going to save us from gun violence. They are not going to save us from militarism. We can, though continue to object. To cry out. To learn to articulate our opposition to violence that is rooted in the call of Jesus and modeled on the action of Jesus.

It is extremely unlikely that any of our youth will encounter a draft board, challenging their stance on war and violence. Even so, I want them to be able to articulate their understandings of war and violence and to demonstrate that they come from a community of faith that supports them when they choose peace. That's why one of the concluding activities of the crash course is to complete a "Peacemaker Registration." It asks them how they've come to their beliefs and to "explain what most clearly shows that your beliefs are deeply held. You may wish to include a description of how your beliefs affect the way you live."

In some ways this last question should convict us all, the grown-ups in the room, for how we live should be rooted in our own deeply held beliefs about the image of God in all humans and all of creation and our commitment to follow Jesus in the way of peace. We are the models for our children. So I am even more determined to object. To keep objecting. And to let this little class be one among many ways that I affirm love over death.

Remembering Our Saints

As a kid, this time of year was only and all about Halloween. Not only was there a mountain of candy and dressing up on the day, but there's a season of anticipation - of coming up with and preparing an original and creative costume. There was also was a party at school, including a parade through the classrooms.
In my school some of the Christian families didn’t allow their children to participate in school Halloween festivities because the holiday was viewed as non-Christian, even anti-Christian and devilish. But of course, Halloween's origins are in the church. (Or course, the church papered over even older pagan holidays, but that's another story).

All Hallows Eve is the evening before All Hallows Day or All Saints Day, the day to remember those saints who have been witnesses to God’s reign in times past. On this day and on All Souls Day which follows, we have an opportunity to intentionally remember those we have lost and the faithful ‘saints’ who have gone before us.

This means the people who we read about in scripture - like Naomi and Ruth pictured above, and whose story we'll hear on Sunday - but it also means in our own lives and histories. Who do we remember from the past and what ‘saints’ are still with us? Who are the family members and beloved of God who have been and are faithful witnesses to God’s reign?

Recently, when asked his name by a teacher, Orie gave it and then continued proudly, "I was named for my great grandpa." He knows that because we've told the story of his great-grandpa Orie Conrad, who refused to don a uniform when conscripted in the 1st World War even though conscientious objection was not yet a legal option. He suffered for it at the hands of his fellow conscripts and was ultimately jailed for a time but remained steadfast in his conviction to follow Jesus' way of peace.

In our family we also remember and tell the stories of Joe’s grandpa and my own who did alternative service as conscientious objectors during the 2nd World War; my grandpa served in the Forestry Service in Canada and Joe’s was a smoke jumper in western Montana. Naomi recently interviewed her grandparents - my parents - for a school project, to learn about their terms with Mennonite Central Committee. In our families, these stories that witness to the way of Jesus – serving the community and eschewing violence – are reminders of how we are still called to follow Christ’s example.

This Sunday in worship we'll all have the opportunity to reflect on the stories of our saints - those living and those no longer among us. As we worship, we'll be engaging the idea of saints in multiple ways: through music and scripture, of course, but also by listening to each other and telling our stories and learning about and creating some saintly iconography. We will worship and create and celebrate our saints around tables in the sanctuary, so prepare for a setup that's a little different this Sunday!

May our saints continue to guide us in the way of Jesus. And may we each be saints who show the way for others.
-
image: Naomi and Ruth by Kelly Latimore

A Just Peace Includes Just Labor Practices

I have been looking forward to the routine of school rhythms and to seeing what the new school year would bring for my kids. So, the delay caused by the Seattle Educators Association is frustrating, but it also has me thinking about unions and justice for workers. I think both of my kids are just happy to have a little extra summer break, and don't care much about why, but we've talked a little about what it means to strike, what it means to be a part of a union and why workers - in this case teachers - would choose not to work in order to pressure their employers to make change.

One of my favorite books for talking about collective bargaining is the classic work of literature, Click, Clack Moo: Cows that Type. In it, Farmer Brown's cows go on strike, refusing to provide milk until Farmer Brown meets their demands: electric blankets to keep warm at night. They send their type-written messages through their mediator, the duck. Eventually, the farmer has to capitulate to their requests.

That's a pretty over-simplified version of what it means to unionize. However, I think it makes a pretty good starting place for a conversation with a younger child - or even an older kid who remembers reading it. And it follows the definition for labor unions used by a PBS lesson plan on Labor Day: "an organized association of workers formed to protect and further their rights and interests." In the case of teachers (or nurses or other service workers) strikes are often also in the interests of those they serve, even though service is disrupted in the short term.

I'm not sure how much history or information our children and teens will encounter in their classrooms about the history and importance of labor unions and organizing. Maybe none. And yet many things we take for granted were gains made by unions: eight-hour workday, weekends, child labor laws, workplace safety, and workers’ compensation all came about because of organized labor. In additon to silly books about cows that type, there are lots of more serious options to supplement kids' education. You can find a list of picture books and YA historical fiction that address the ways that organizing here are here, including how children have been involved. You can also learn the pros and cons of unions in one minute from One Minute Economics or hear about how unions have benefitted all workers in this video by Robert Reich.

As for our striking teachers, details of what SEA is asking for in a Washington Education Association chart here. They include just wages for the lowest paid support staff and instructional assistants, especially those in special ed and multi-lingual education as well as caps on class size and caseload. All of which will both be beneficial to the workers and to the students and families they serve. To me, this is an issue of justice for both teachers and the families in our communities who have the greatest need and the highest barriers to learning and involvement.

I plan to support the striking teachers in my neighborhood by signing up on a parent-organized rotation of bringing snacks, drinks and ice to teachers on the picket line. I also wrote to the school board encouraging them to trust teachers when they express the needs of their schools and communities.

How are you engaging? How are you explaining unions, organizing and the teachers strike to your kids. Let me know!

Opting Out: Chosing NOT to Register for Selective Service

Thursday is Veteran's Day. Some of our kids might be encountering assignments in school that invite them to write about and celebrate veterans, assemblies that either glorify military or recruitment visits by armed forces representatives. When I was a kid in Canada, we glued crepe paper poppies to construction paper and copied out the poem "In Flanders Fields" by Canadian poet John McRae. It memorializes fallen veterans and invokes the living to "take up our quarrel with the foe." Honestly, I hadn't re-read that poem for many years and yikes!

As peace-making followers of Jesus, who want to encourage our children to encounter calls to militarism or even to remembrance with alternative kinds of activities. In the past, some of our parents have worked with their children on alternatives like researching heroes of peace in their families or communities, or excusing their children from attending Veteran's Day assemblies. We will not take up the quarrel, thank you. But until recently, many families haven't felt like they had an alternative for registering for Selective Service.

The Selective Service System is a program by which young men who have turned18 are required within 30 days to join a registry that names them as eligible for military service in the case of the draft. There is no way to register as a conscientious objector pre-emptively. There are almost no exceptions, though one of the things that is a part of my work with youth in our congregation is returning periodically to a Conscientious Objection registration, which helps young people (of all genders) record their beliefs about war and violence and the call of Jesus to peacemaking. In the case of a draft, those young people would have their beliefs documented should they claim CO status.

There is good news! I learned earlier this year that those who refuse to complete registration to the Selective Service System are no longer excluded from receiving federal financial aid. Until now, failing to register meant that access to FAFSA was barred. This has been one of the major hang-ups of many young people who are trying to decide whether or not to complete the application. Choosing to opt out of adding your name to the list of those willing to be "take up the quarrel" doesn't seem like much of a choice if it means that you then won't have money for higher education.

That doesn't mean there aren't still some consequences: those who are of age "must register to be eligible for state-funded student financial aid in many states, most federal employment, some state employment, security clearance for contractors, [some federal] job training...and U.S. citizenship for immigrant men."

And "failure to register with Selective Service is a violation of the Military Selective Service Act. Conviction for such a violation may result in imprisonment for up to five years and/or a fine of not more than $250,000." (More on all that here). However, my understanding about those consequences - particularly the legal implications - is that no one has been prosecuted for decades.

One additional tidbit that I learned is that in some states, any application for a state learner’s permit, driver’s license or renewal, or I.D. card equates consent to have information automatically transferred to Selective Service for registration if you are between the ages of 18-26. But Washington is not one of those states! So that's an additional heads up to look carefully at those forms to make sure you're not opting in when filling out those first forms for learners permits or renewing drivers' licenses.

Folks, however your spending this Veteran's Day, may the peace of Jesus light your way.

The Citzenship of the Saints

I've been thinking a lot about identity this week.  I became a naturalized US citizen this week. This was after a wait of almost a year and a half after I first made my application.  The wheels of bureaucracy turn extremely slowing in this administration. So while this has been a day I've been anticipating for a long time, it's always been with deep ambivalence.  Unlike so many people who come to this country, while this was a choice for the sake of marriage and a job, it was also not something I had ever sought or dreamed of or aspired to.

As much as I have loved Seattle, I have also prided myself a little on my identity as an outsider, and particularly as a Canadian outsider.  Especially in these days when progressive Americans are crashing the Canadian immigration website with their interest in leaving the country, I think I've even felt a little smug.  So to add "American" to my identity has felt not so much like an addition but somehow like it's canceling out both my other identity and my identity as "other".

And that's a problem.  Not that I feel like American-ness is canceling out my identity as Canadian, but that I've been as tied up as I have been in my identity as citizen of any nation over what should be my primary identity as a disciple of Jesus.  If I am a citizen of anywhere it is of the Reign of God.

As I prepare my message for All Saints Day and think about the beloved saints who have shown me the way, I don't think about good citizens, I think of good disciples.  Sometimes they are one in the same, but sometimes, good disciples are troublemakers and rabble-rousers.  Sometimes good disciples don't follow the laws of the land (as I had to promise in my citizenship ceremony) but protest laws that are unjust.  Sometimes good disciples are noisy and nosey and get in the way of governance for the sake of peace.  Jesus was not a good citizen. And when I think about my own kids and the little ones whom we will dedicate in the way of Jesus on Sunday, I hope that they will be better disciples than they are citizens too.

At this time of year All Saints and Veteran's Day (Remembrance Day in Canada) converge to make me turn to the people who I remember as witnesses for peace.  (I've written about that before here and here). I hope that as I continue to figure out what it means to live as a citizen of two countries, I'll keep remembering the people and identity that root me in my identity not in nation but as God's beloved child.

me and my freshly minted citizenship certificate

Does God Fight?

I grew up with Bible stories in a way I'm not repeating with my own children.  We sometimes will a story or two from Desmond Tutu's Children of God Storybook Bible.  But I'm not systematic and don't, as my parents did, have multiple additional bible story books or do a daily family devotional.  I'll admit that in part it's because I don't want to have to deal with some of the problematic Old Testament stories of conquest, war and (not to put too fine a point on it) genocide.  I can't even remember how my parents dealt with that.  I think maybe we just breezed over those many other people that Israel conquered and killed to enter Canaan or somehow I saw that land as empty (besides the rivers of milk and honey, that is).  I didn't see those conquered people as people.

I'm not willing to do that now - let the conquered be invisible or non human; there are too many contemporary and historical examples of oppression based in these texts for me to let it go.  So how do I approach this?  For one, I think Desmond Tutu has it right - in his retellings of the Biblical stories, he focuses on love and justice.  And many stories of the Old Testament left out altogether.  The Catechesis of the Good Shepherd, a Montessori based Sunday school program our congregation used at one time, didn't introduce the Hebrew Bible until children are at least nine - and then began with the prophets.  Early focus is on Jesus' care, welcome and love.

In the high school Sunday school class this fall we're looking at some of the stories of war and violence.  Together we're trying to examine them with some nuance.  I'm using as my starting place a curriculum called Does God Fight? from the Mennonite publisher Faith and Life Press.  Some of my takeaways from that and from my experience with these stories are these:

1. The Bible is written by people who had a particular understanding of God.  Oppressed themselves, their God was one who delivered and did so absolutely. 
2. The God of these war stories is the one who delivers.  The people are to depend not on their own power but on the God who fights for them.
3. Jesus has priority.  We believe Jesus to be the most clear interpreter of God's desire for humanity and model for how we are to be followers of God's will.  And when Jesus interpreted scripture he did so in a way that pointed to non-violence, compassion and God's love for all nations and peoples.

Do does God fight?  Well, in the Biblical narrative, yes.  If children and teens can understand the nuance of historical context and the human need to describe a God who completely and totally has their backs then maybe these stories can still have some meaning.  There are still communities of oppressed people for whom a story of a God who leads people into safety and to a home of their own is important.  I absolutely do not count myself as a part of such a community.  Instead I lean into Jesus.  Jesus who loves and blesses the the imprisoned and the weak.  Jesus who welcomes his disciples questions and chooses little ones so sit beside him.

May we always have Jesus at our side
as we struggle to be a people
who says no to violence and oppression.
Amen.

--

Photo by Patrick Hendry on Unsplash

For Mothering

In honor of Mother's Day this Sunday, I offer a song, a prayer and a reminder.

The 23rd Psalm
First, I again share with you this masterpiece by Bobby McFarrin. Maybe I'll share it every year. It's so good!

A Prayer for all Kinds of Mothering
Second, this Mothers Day blessing adapted from a prayer that was shared around social media a couple years ago and which I found posted by Sarah Bessey on facebook, based on a post by Amy Young here.

May you know the blessing of a mothering God...
if you are like Tamar, struggling with infertility, or a miscarriage.

if you are like Rachel, counting the women among your family and friends who year by year and month by month get pregnant, while you wait.

if you are like Naomi, and have known the bitter sting of a child's death.

if you are like Joseph and Benjamin, and your mother has died.

if your relationship with your mother was marked by trauma, abuse, or abandonment, or she just couldn't parent you the way you needed.

if you've been like Moses' mother and put a child up for adoption, trusting another family to love your child into adulthood.

if you've been like Pharaoh's daughter, called to love children whom you did not bear.

if you, like many, are watching (or have watched) your mother age, and disappear into the long goodbye of dementia.

if you, like Mary, are pregnant for the very first time and waiting breathlessly for the miracle of your first child.

if like Hagar, now you are mothering alone.

if motherhood is your greatest joy and toughest struggle all rolled into one.

if you are watching your child battle substance abuse, a public legal situation, mental illness, or another situation which you can merely watch unfold.

if you like so many women before you do not wish to be a mother, are not married, or in so many other ways do not fit into societal norms.

I want you to know that I am praying for you if you see yourself reflected in all, or none of these stories.

You are loved. You are seen. You are worthy.

And may you know the deep love without end of our big, wild, beautiful God who is the very best example of a parent that we know.

Mothers for Peace
And finally, if you are still reading, a reminder. The origins of Mother's Day was the intention that it be a day for peace an unity. It's creator was Ann Jarvis who wanted to continue the work of and honor her own mother, who had witnessed the devastation of the American Civil War and worked to heal bodies, spirits and communities broken by it. Ann was joined in her campaign to have Mother's Day recognized as a national holiday by suffragette Julia Ward Howe who wrote the "Mother's Day Proclamation" including this memorable quote:

“Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn all that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. We women of one country will be too tender of those of another country to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.”

From the bosom of the devastated earth a voice goes up with our own. It says, “Disarm, disarm! The sword is not the balance of justice.” Blood does not wipe out dishonor nor violence indicate possession.

Happy Mothers' Day. In the name of the one God who mothers us all.

Between Voting and Veteran's Day

This coming Sunday is Veteran’s Day. For students in some schools it’s reason for military assemblies and recruitment. For many working folks, it’s a day off, intended to honor and recognized the lives of military veterans and courageous acts in wartime. But this is also the 100th anniversary of Armistice Day, from which Veteran’s Day was born. The intention of the original Armistice Day was literally a laying down of arms; remembering the cost of war and violence and working toward a peaceful future.

I shake my head to think of where the world - and especially the United States - has come since that armistice treaty and its commitment to work peaceably with neighbors worldwide. That first world war was, of course, not the war to end all wars. The United States has become the dominant global military power and the proportion of military spending in this country equals half its discretionary budget.

Having just come through another election in the US, it seems to me that progressives - including Christians, including peace-loving and justice-seeking Mennonites who would favor a reclaiming of the non-violent message of armistice - lean heavily into the idea that a vote equals a voice. Through our votes, the idea goes, we can make change and begin to align our Christian ideals with the society we live in. I did not vote in this election. Most folks know after this many years of ministry that I can’t vote because I am not (yet) a citizen. Does that mean that I don’t have a voice?

I am glad that this election is over if for no other reason than I will no longer have to see in all my social media feeds and in advertising the urge to vote, Vote, VOTE!! While I wouldn’t say it’s painful, I would say it’s a little irritating. People are not voting for many reasons. A few by choice or religious conviction - as our Anabaptist ancestors had - that our allegiance is to Christ alone (more about this in Pastor Megan’s most recent sermon). A few from disgust or apathy. But many people who would like to vote are disenfranchised, because like me they are immigrants. Because they are in jail or have committed a felony. Because of unreasonable voting requirements that amount to voter suppression.

Folks, I’m glad that those of you who could vote did. Theologian and leader Drew Hart, who identifies as an ‘Anablacktivist’ tweeted this on election day, “Voting won't usher shalom into the world, but it can curb the injustice & limit the dominance of powerful people seeking to harm the least and last of society. That's why I vote, and then continue the hard work 365 days of the year.” So I am celebrating the strides forward in representation made by women, people of color, including indigenous folk, LGBTQ representatives and leaders. And I don’t assume that just because I didn’t vote I don’t have a voice to raise for the sake of peace, for the sake of shalom building this Veteran’s Day and beyond.

Deeper (and Broader) Than I Expected: Reflections on a Faith Formation Conference

Because of the subtitle of this conference, “Deep Faith: Faith Formation for All Ages” I went with a pretty narrow expectation.  It’s one I was looking forward to, but narrow nonetheless.  I hoped to engage the question of how to work at education and formation intergenerationally.  How does one shape a Sunday school class or worship service such that it appeals and genuinely connects with people from toddler to senior and allows folk of all ages to learn with and from each other?  I did come away with a few ideas.  Ideas I hope to work at and explore more in the future, including an understanding that building bridges of learning and connection intended to meet the particular challenges of, for example, a four-year-old in worship, may might also be wide enough to include others with different demographics but similar needs.  Wide enough to welcome many into an experience of God.

What I came to experience in this conference was not wholly what I expected but was still pretty exciting. Two workshops in particular had me excited to come home and think about how we implement elements in my context.  The first, led by Carrie Martens, was a workshop about marking faith and milestone moments across the life span.  Like most congregations we offer some ritual life-marking moments in worship, like infant dedication and baptism.  We also offer young adults hand-made comforters when they are ready to move on after high school.  But I was challenged to think about the many other ways to mark life-moments as sacred through adulthood and at points throughout childhood: the beginning of school for a child, consecration of singleness for adults who remain unmarried, blessing on retirement when adults complete work marking a ‘fruitful past and fruitful future.’* Since there is no beginning or ending to the formation of our identity in Christ, ritual markers along the journey give us a vocabulary to name that identity.  Being able to name our identity allows us to further deepen and claim it.

One of the areas we Mennonites have claimed as central to our identity is that of peace-makers.  Yet it seems to me that it’s rare for a congregation to actively engage in educating and forming members (young and old) in practices of engaging conflict in healthy and transformative ways.  I have certainly heard many stories of unhealthy and passive aggressive ways that churches have dealt (or not) with conflict. That’s why Rachel Miller Jacobs’ concept of ‘Ordinary Time Forgiveness’ seems both so simple and so radical. 

Rachel introduced those who participated in her workshop to some tools of non-violent communication and in particular we had fun with her deck of ‘Feelings and Needs’ cards.**  These cards, as the name suggests, each name either a feeling or a need.  When confronted with a conflict or situation in which discernment or transformation is necessary, one may use these cards, either alone or with another, to identify the two or three feelings that are primarily evoked.  This allows a listener to use empathetic responding when choosing cards for the story-teller to test if the feeling is right and for teller to respond.  Once primary emotions are identified, the needs cards come into play.  It is the met or unmet needs that evoke those feelings and when identified, we can so much more easily communicate – the first step in moving toward resolution and forgiveness. 

It's more complex than that, of course.  And conflicts, like people, may be much more multi-layered, but because this is about the every-day, ‘ordinary time’ conflict, each of us being formed with the useful tools of engagement is so important to confronting the really fraught and complicated stuff.  It makes so much sense to begin engaging the notion of conflict as normal and forgiveness as central in childhood, then to continue to deepen our understanding of self and other as we mature, growing in faith and experience.  I am looking forward to trying testing these and many of the ideas I encountered at Deep Faith and I’m very grateful to have been able to participate.

__

* Carrie Martens, “Faith Markers at Stirling Avenue Mennonite Church (in worship),” table.

** Rachel received her cards from Malinda Berry, Assistant Professor of Theology and Ethics at Anabaptist Mennonite Biblical Seminary.  They were developed based on the Non-Violent Communication practices and principles of Marshall Rosenberg and much more can be found at Malinda’s website here.